By Richard Lederer
In what different language, asks Lederer, do humans force on a throughway and park in a driveway, and your nostril can run and your toes can odor? In loopy ENGLISH, Lederer frolics during the logic-boggling byways of our language, getting to know the names for phobias you didn't recognize you might have, the longest phrases in our dictionaries, and the shortest sentence containing each letter within the alphabet. You'll take a bird's-eye view of our beastly language, banquet on a ceremonial dinner of mushrooming meals metaphors, and meet the self-reflecting medical professional Rotcod, destined to talk merely in palindromes.
Read Online or Download Crazy English PDF
Similar humor books
Over the process his lengthy and amazing profession, god has actually obvious all of it. and never simply obvious. in reality, the multi-talented deity has performed a pivotal position in lots of significant occasions, together with the construction of the universe, the whole thing of worldwide background, the lifetime of each individual who has ever lived, and the winning transitioning of yankee Idol into the post–Simon Cowell period.
Lacey Yeager is younger, appealing, and impressive adequate to take the NYC artwork global via typhoon. Groomed at Sotheby's and hungry to maintain hiking the social and occupation ladders positioned ahead of her, Lacey charms women and men, young and old, wealthy or even richer along with her magnetic air of mystery and liveliness. Her ascension to the top stages of town parallel the hovering heights--and, every now and then, the darkish lows--of the artwork global and the rustic from the past due Nineties via this present day.
First released in paperback in 2008.
A hilarious compendium of all that's bizarre approximately existence within the British Isles – the eccentric, extraordinary forms and outright oddity pronounced during the last 12 months by means of the nation's newspapers, together with: father or mother headline, 'Man with fake leg hit with rest room lid. '; The Astrological journal, 'announces that it's to stop because of unexpected conditions. '
Jack Crossley spent a few forty years in Fleet highway and has compiled this laugh-out-loud selection of anecdotes and unusual goings-on which sound so outlandish you definitely couldn't cause them to up.
A funny rant concerning the author's struggles together with his wife's tricky canines relates his frustrations at consistent canines drama, aggression, and behavioral matters
- Look at This F*cking Hipster
- The Best A Man Walks Into a Bar . . . Jokes
- Genius and Heroin: The Illustrated Catalogue of Creativity, Obsession, and Reckless Abandon Through the Ages
- Steal This Book (25th Anniversary Facsimile Edition)
- The Stainless Steel Rat Gets Drafted
- The Ginger Man
Additional info for Crazy English
Wait! ” he shouted. His cell phone screeched for attention from his front pocket, vibrating provocatively against his already agitated manhood. He yanked the device from his pants and pitched it into the woods before turning back to the intern. “It’s alright, it’s okay, hon,” he continued. “Don’t you worry about anything. It was just a little alarm. Absolutely no harm done. ” This reassurance downgraded the intern’s crying situation to a sniffle. ” The president closed his eyes and grinned smugly as the intern lowered herself to her carpet-burned knees in the wet grass.
This is not a sewing circle, ladies. ” Sherri’s eyes darted back and forth between the camera enclosures in the ceiling. She spotted the one that was staring her down and extended a pair of bony middle fingers to the lens. “I saw that, Becquerel! ” Sherri held up her hands and wiggled her fingers in the air as if to say, “Ooooh, I’m shaking. ” Vivian looked into the spying cameras with a dull sigh. She didn’t know if there was a God, but she knew that there was always a colossal being watching her every move from on high.
With a great, gasping effort he bent over, tore the packing slip from the side of the Beta Burn shipping crate, and gave it a wheezing once-over. ” he roared, thrusting the paper in her face. 99! What the hell is wrong with you?